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Click and Heat, Thawing Optional
By MICHELLE SLATALLA
December 23, 1999 -- I never met an artichoke I didn't like. Of course, that could be because I never tasted an artichoke -- or an avocado or even hollandaise sauce -- until college.
I had a lot of pent-up demand, after growing up in a house where the recipes tended more toward "weenie stew," the specialty of a family member who wishes to remain nameless (I'll call her Mom). To make weenie stew, slice a package of franks into a pot of canned whole tomatoes. Add some canned corn (stop reading here if you feel queasy), then bring to a boil.
For my introduction to other cuisines, I thank my friend Mary O'Doherty, widely considered one of the best cooks ever to coax heat from the cranky electric stoves that plagued the off-campus apartments in Bloomington, Ind., in the early 1980's. Mary must also live with the knowledge that the powerful craving for delicious foods she unleashed led me as a penniless freshman to shoplift guacamole (marked an outrageous $2.54).
I still crave three Mary O'Doherty-worthy meals a day. However, the constraints of my current life style -- imagine the phone ringing and the dog throwing up on the dining room rug as three little girls of varying heights clutch at my legs and, in synchronized whines, blame me for the invention of long division -- often eliminate the leisurely hours I would otherwise devote to cooking.
So I was excited recently to learn that on the Internet I could buy meals -- or substantial entrees that needed only a loaf of crusty bread to attain the status of supper -- over the Internet. The meals would arrive on my doorstep, ready to be stored in the refrigerator or freezer until minutes before eating. It all sounded appetizing, but specialty food may be one area where the Internet and my expectations are hopelessly ill-matched. The current proof that online shopping works is that whatever you ordered arrives relatively on time and with a minimum of calls to the shipping department. But as any gourmand knows, the proof of the pudding (not that I ordered pudding) is in the taste.
With New Year's Eve coming up, I decided to hunt for appetizers. Over two weeks, I ordered from four online retailers - <Ö>, www.customcreationfoods.com, <Ö>. All items arrived when promised, within 48 hours, packaged securely inside Styrofoam containers and cooled by either dry ice or little freezer pillows. With great excitement, I took an inventory of my loot: black bean soup, appetizers, seafood cakes <Ö>.
When I phoned Stefan Strehler, co-owner of Custom Creation Foods, to complain, he said the problem was one of perception, by which he meant my perception. "You pay to get any food delivered," Mr. Strehler said. "A nine-inch pizza that comes to the door costs you $15, and then you tip the driver $2, and you have paid $17 for a pizza that cost the company $1 to make." <Ö>
The best foods came from Custom Creation Foods, where items were partially cooked, highly seasoned and then frozen quickly before being mailed. The technique was successful when it came to the tuna cakes, flavored with ginger and lemongrass. The soups were a little salty, but let me point out that the saltiness has not stopped me from having several portions, including a piping hot cup of the shrimp and corn soup that I am eating right now as I type.
The jalapeÒo and cheese "nibblers" ($6.46 for a two-pound bag containing 45 to 50 appetizers) were certainly good enough to serve at a New Year's Eve party. <Ö>
But not for me. On New Year's Eve, I'll honor my food roots. No, not the weenie stew. I'll be dipping artichoke leaves into hollandaise sauce.
(Click here to review Worldmind's designs for Custom Creation Foods.)
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